In celebration of her big comeback victory over DW Kendra, Alexis Luciano has decided to treat herself and her assistants to a trip to Florida. After spending most of the day shopping they have decided to spend some time at Alexis’ favorite Spa, Spa V at the Hotel Victor. After receiving gold facials and full body massages the they have decided to work on their tans at poolside. As they sit lounging by the pool sipping mojitos, Alexis’ assistant Jake has a realization.
Assistant Jake-”Whoa I just realized something Lexie, shouldn’t we be down in D.C. already getting you ready for your fourway match? I’m so sorry I haven’t even bought your plane tickets yet.”
Assistant Jessica-”Question… why do you have to buy your own plane tickets? I never understood that.”
“Because I can’t stand the people I work with enough to travel in mass with them and plus I could never stand to fly anything less than business class.”
Jessica-”Oh.”
Alexis takes a drink of her mojito before looking at Jake annoyed.
“Jake if I’m not worried about it why the hell should you be? I know where I need to be and when I need to be there. Besides did you forget that my daddy is lending us his private jet for the next couple of weeks?”
Jake-”Really? I didn’t know that.”
Jessica-”I knew that.”
“Yeah he says he doesn’t think I should have to fly with a bunch of commoners when I could just use his jet. My dad is so thoughtful, he even restocked it with my favorite champagne and hired a of new staff for it. He showed me a bunch of pictures and credentials of potential pilots and stewardesses so that I can choose who I want to fly me around. He said he wanted to let me choose so I would feel more at ease with them.”
Jessica-”Aww that’s so nice! So who did you choose? Like former military pilots or like flight attendants with medical backgrounds or what?”
Alexis laughs and shakes her head.
“Um no… I chose whoever I thought was hot. Why do I care what kind of plane you used to fly and where you used to fly it? I don’t care but if I have to see your face flying my plane or serving my drinks for the next two weeks you had better be easy on the eyes.”
Jessica-”You chose them based on looks and not skill?! Wow way to prioritize Lexie. Let’s hope your hot pilot doesn’t kill us in a fiery crash into the side of a mountain and all your sexy little stewardesses know how to make a decent cosmopolitan.”
Alexis rolls her eyes.
“Whatever I’m sure they do okay? Hey I have a question for you though. Who else is in the fourway?”
Jessica-”Assasin, Joker, and Chase Jameson?”
“Chase Jameson? Why does that name sound familiar to me?”
Jake-”It’s probably the last name Jameson. You know like Jenna?”
“Oh right Jenna Jameson the porn star. I remember now. Think they’re related?”
Jessica-”Maybe.”
Jake-”If they are maybe he can hook me up with an autograph!”
“Yeah okay I doubt he’s going to be in a good mood after I beat him and steal his shot at the new title away from him.”
Jake-”That’s true. Bummer.”
Alexis shrugs as she looks at her assistants unsurely.
“Okay so what do we know about these guys? I honestly don’t know shit about them. It must be the whole lack of importance thing.”
Jessica-”I don’t know much about them either Lexie but I’ll definitely find out for you.”
“Thanks Jess .”
Jake-”I’ll help her research them.”
Jessica-”No that’s okay you’re more likely to get in my way than anything.”
Jake looks deep in thought as he tries to think of a way to help out.
Jake-”Ooh I know! I’ll call and get us a hotel while we’re in D.C.”
Jessica-”I already did that. We have a reservation at the Mandarin Oriental.”
Jake-”Okay than I’ll rent us a car.”
Jessica-”Already done. I reserved us an M Series BMW in Lexie’s favorite color.”
Jake-”A red BMW, that’s cool.”
Jessica-”Pearl white.”
Jake-”I thought red was your favorite color.”
“Yeah like two months ago. I have to change my color every month, my therapist said I should. Something about colors setting spiritual moods and some crap like that. She said it’s good for my morale to have new changes and make sure nothing stays the same. You didn’t know that?”
Jake-”No.”
Jessica looks at Jake with a smirk.
Jessica-”I knew that.”
The three sit quietly as Jake stares at Alexis with a pout on his face. After a while she notices him making sad faces at her so she looks at him with her eyebrow raised in confusion.
“What the hell are you looking at? Is my hair messed up or something?”
Jake folds his arms in front of his chest and looks down at the ground sadly.
Jake-”No your hair is fine.. It’s just that… well…”
“Well what? Spit it out.”
Jake-”Well how come Jessica always knows everything before I do? We both work for you shouldn’t we both know about the same things? I just feel like I‘m left out or something.”
Alexis lets out a laugh.
“Oh my god are you like jealous or something?”
Jake-”No… well yeah I guess a little. I just don’t think it’s fair.”
Jessica-”Jake I know more about Lexie than you because I’m closer to her than you are.”
Jake-”What? No your not! I knew her before you did.”
Jessica-”No you didn’t.”
Jake-”Yes I did.”
Jessica-”No you didn’t.”
Jake-”Yes I did!”
Jessica-”Well whatever I spend more time with her than you do that’s why we’re so close to each other.”
Jake-”Not uh!”
Jessica- “Yeah!”
Jake-”Well I do more work than you do! Your more like a glorified groupie than an assistant! I get to do all the financial planning, cleaning, event coordinating, heavy lifting, and plus I‘m the one that takes care of her dog! All you do is go to spas, go shopping, go out clubbing until the wee hours, drink yourself silly all day, go to all the shows, and basically get whatever you want.”
Jessica-”That’s not true!
Jake-”Yes it is!”
Jessica-”Oh get over it you’re acting like a child!”
Jake-”Shut up groupie!”
Jessica-”No you shut up you little sissy!”
Jake-”Groupie!”
Jessica-”Sissy!”
Alexis who has been trying to ignore the little confrontation has finally heard enough. She quickly downs the rest of her drink before taking the empty glass and throwing it down on the floor. The sound of glass shattering startles the assistants who look at her with confusion.
“Enough of the whining you guys! You are acting like stupid little kids fighting over a fucking toy or something. The truth is you’re both lucky to be where you are and not one of you is more favored than the other. Now shut the hell up! You two are totally ruining my spa day!”
Everyone gets quiet as a younger looking hotel maintenance clerk comes out with a dust pan and a mini broom to clean up the mess. As the guy goes over to clean up the mess Alexis stands up and puts her hand up to stop him as he looks at her unsurely.
“Excuse me guy you don’t have to worry about that we’ll get it.”
The clerk looks at Alexis shyly.
Hotel Clerk-”Um it’s okay miss, it’s my job. I don’t mind.”
“No please I insist. Here let me have that.”
Alexis takes the dust pan and the sweeper away from the clerk who looks at her nervously. Alexis then tosses the broom part at Jessica.
“You sweep.”
Alexis throws the dustpan at Jake.
“You hold the dustpan.”
The assistants look at each other as they slowly rise up from their lounge chairs.
“Come on guys let’s see a little teamwork.”
Alexis watches with a satisfied smile on her. The hotel clerk stands next to her and stares at the scene before him in awe.
Hotel clerk-”Wow it must be nice to have assistants.”
Alexis looks at the clerk.
“Yeah assistants are awesome. They’re like cute little animals that will do anything you want so long as you feed them, house them, and throw them a little treat every now and then.”
Hotel clerk-”Excuse me miss may I ask you a question?”
“Yeah go for it.”
Hotel Clerk-”May I get an autograph from you? It’s really against our policy to ask for autographs but I’m a big fan of the DUW and I recognized you right away.”
“Yeah sure I guess. What’s your name?”
Hotel Clerk-”David.”
“Okay David I don’t like have a pen or anything with me right now. If you go grab one real quick I’ll give you an autograph.”
David-”Okay great thank you so much!”
David runs off to get a pen and paper as Alexis looks at Jessica and Jake who have finished cleaning the mess up and have already dumped the glass in a trash can nearby. They go back to their lounge chairs and sit down with upset looks on their faces.
“Good job you two. See what you can accomplish when you get along instead of bickering with each other?”
The two assistants nod and stare off distantly as David the hotel clerk returns with a pen and a piece of paper.
David-”Here you go Ms. Luciano thank you so much for doing this.”
“It’s cool. I normally hate signing autographs but you caught me on a good day.”
Alexis signs the paper and even personalizes it with a little message for David who smiles happily.
“Here you go all done.”
David-”Thanks! Would it be asking too much if I could also take a picture with you on my phone?”
“Nah it’s cool.”
David pulls his phone out of his pocket and moves closer to Alexis who takes the phone away from him and tosses it to Jessica.
“Take a picture of me and David will you babe?”
Jessica sighs and stands up from her chair as Alexis wraps her arms around David’s neck and puts her face next to him as he holds her close for their pose. Jessica takes a few pictures and hands the phone back to David before taking her seat again.
David-”Wow thank you for doing that you just made my day! I hope everything goes well for you in your match. Even if you lose the match you’re still a winner in my book.”
Alexis raises her eyebrow at David.
“Why would I lose the match?”
David-”Well you know cause there’s like three big dudes also in the match and you’re a lot smaller then them.”
“So because I’m smaller than them you automatically think I’m going to lose?”
David-”Well the odds are against you but I know that no matter what you’re going to put up a great fight.”
“I’m going to do more than put up a fight, I’m going to pick up the win! Of course a stupid sexist man like you sees a woman and automatically thinks she’s weak and incapable of beating her male counterparts. That way of thinking is so outdated, how many men do I have to show up and beat down before you assholes take me seriously? The fact of the matter is that I’m destined for greatness and that new title is as good as mine. You’re an idiot for believing that anything without a penis is automatically inferior. Why else would women be allowed to wrestle if we weren’t as capable of competing as the men are?”
David-”Because women are fun to watch in the ring.”
“Fun?”
David-”It’s entertaining to see all the hair pulling and skimpy little outfits.”
“When the hell have you ever seen me pull hair huh? I don’t! I’m not here to amuse perverts like you so you can get your rocks off staring at me. I compete because I have talent and because I have a goal set in mind to become a world champion! Something a stupid little nerd like you could never be! It’s men like you that make the majority look ridiculous! Not all men are dogs but you certainly seem to have the intelligence of one. So you want to act like a dog David? Well here..”
Alexis grabs David’s phone out of his hand and tosses it over her shoulder and into the pool. David’s mouth drops open in shock as he stares at his phone sinking to the bottom of the pool.
“Go fetch like one. And one more thing…”
Alexis snatches the autographed paper out of David’s grip as well and rips it up as much as she can before tossing the little pieces in his face as he still stands in disbelief.
“You don’t deserve to have my autograph and you know what else? I don’t think you deserve to work here either. Have fun trying to talk your way out of losing your job once I tell your management that you were down here harassing me this whole time. Honestly who do you think they’re going to side with?”
Alexis flashes David a devious smile before turning on her heel away from him and walking past her assistants. She snaps her fingers twice at them and they both jump up quickly and follow her inside leaving her once adoring fan looking startled.
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Subject: Alexis Luciano vs. Tha Joka vs. Assasin vs. Chase Jameson 
Tue Jul 29, 2008 6:52 pm
